Knowing who you are is a very crucial aspect of healing yourself. How can you avoid a disaster if you are simply floating through life with no clear sense of what you stand for, and what you refuse to tolerate?
“The
more you know yourself, the more patience you have for what you see in others.”
- Erik Erikson
Think too of the unhappy Doctor who is only a
Doctor because his parents decided that he needed to become the first Doctor in
their family. What about the hen picked mama’s boy who dates a girl he cannot
stand because it makes his mother happy? These three have a lot in common.
When we take the time to understand who we truly
are, the intricacies of our own personalities, we will have the keys to unlock
our true potential. You cannot become your best self if you do not know what
that entails. When you understand yourself, you are more likely to end up
choosing a career that you love. And it is quite easy to be passionately driven
to achieve great things when you are pursuing a career that you love.
Additionally, when you are at the top of your
game, you will seek out the kind of partners and friends that will make you
happy and thus bring out the best in you. They will understand the way you
think and may very well think the same way you do too. These are the kind of
people who will not laugh at your dreams or be jealous of your success. Being
surrounded by loving, supportive people, will make you a kinder, happier and
dare I say, more successful person.
Individuals who have a deep understanding of
themselves, are often more decisive and optimistic. That is because these
individuals are in full control of their life choices and they chose well. They are more likely to see opportunities
where others see setbacks. It also takes far less effort to be productive when
you enjoy what you do. Additionally, the fact that you enjoy your career will
give you a competitive edge and you will not depend on the praise of others for
motivation. The satisfaction of a job well done will keep you pushing forward.
I know that these may seem like ideal
circumstances, where our choices are not dependent on the desires of our family
and where we are all strong enough not to succumb to the pressure they will put
on us to make a certain decision. But believe me, knowing and truly
understanding yourself will open doors to opportunities you would have never
seen coming otherwise. It will be easier for you to stand up to the pressures
around you when you know without a doubt what the right decision for you will
be. I am not encouraging you to shrug your responsibilities of providing for
your family, I am encouraging you to understand who you are and be true to who
you are at all times. You will be much happier as a result, and far easier to
love, when you are not carrying the heavy weight of a bad decision around for
the rest of your life.
This is easier said than done, but it is not impossible. You can start with some objective assessment. This does not mean simply asking the people around what they think of you. Your interactions with them, whether negative or positive, will prevent them from being as objective as you need them to be. A better option would be making use of a reputable personality test. One of the popular options is the Myers-Briggs Personality type test. This test will determine which of the 16 personality types of this theory best describes who you are. It has gained popularity in recent times because its results can be used to determine the environment you work best in and even how you interact with the people around you. Plus whether you like the results or not they tend to be surprisingly accurate.
Career aptitude tests are another great option.
These are designed to help you understand your skill set better and how you can
use these skills to select the right career. It is never too late to start a
career that you can love.
Once you have a carefully thought out plan that will allow you to care for your responsibilities and still venture into a field that you love, go for it. It might be a case that money is tight and you are already strapped for time and may not be able to make a move right now. But I would encourage you to continue preparing yourself. Keep learning all that you can about that career online or from the people around you. That way, if the opportunity should arise, you will be in a position to take it.
Once you have taken the time to learn about
yourself, you may find some dirty laundry and hidden scars that you probably
would have rather kept hidden. Unfortunately, you have been wearing these scars every day in the way you interact
with those around you. These scars could have made you too soft to express how
you feel or too cold to care about the feelings of others. Now that you can see
yourself clearly, become the best version of yourself. Love yourself. And above
all else, be true to yourself. Knowing your limits is another important skill
to master in order to navigate through this crazy world successfully.